tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2021263010707009752.post6084683726155233057..comments2023-08-25T01:48:56.682-07:00Comments on Enjoyceinglife: Beyonce, Booty Shaking and Child RaisingAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00932643238944322402noreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2021263010707009752.post-91295087838163038312009-02-10T20:04:00.000-08:002009-02-10T20:04:00.000-08:00In my opinion i love B because i am a teen but my ...In my opinion i love B because i am a teen but my parents would never let me danc elike that. I am in a dance crew and i still am under there thumb, but i respect that and i love them for watching out for me. my mom and dad try to teach me about whats on the inside because a lot of people say im drop dead gorgeous. i may hate them now because of what they tell me, and stuff like that but in the end they are always right. they wont let me wear little clothes, and stuff, and also they wont let me dance like that. but joyce, try to keep your little girl pure and as much like a angel sent from god for as long as u possibly can. may god bless you everyday.<BR/><BR/>With love,<BR/>JayAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2021263010707009752.post-59947099244768339662009-01-10T14:21:00.000-08:002009-01-10T14:21:00.000-08:00Beyonce is a prostitute...a well paid prostitute b...Beyonce is a prostitute...a well paid prostitute but a prostitute noetheless. <BR/><BR/>Like the saying goes..."what is the difference between a $20.00 whore and a $1000.00 call girl? about $980.00. Both of them are whores.<BR/><BR/>Beyonce I am sure was sexually abused as a child. The whole disassociatve "other personality" thing. (Sasha Fierce) It all just screams "I was abused and felt controlled" and now I picked a name for my "other personailty" that is strong & sexy.<BR/><BR/>No that would be the epitome of weakness.<BR/><BR/>All the self image, self esteem stuff has one thing in common. "SELF" as in SELFISH.<BR/><BR/>Beyonce should just claim to be an entertainer. WHy pull the "I'm a Christian" routine? Sure give Jesus a black eye...Jessica Simpson does the same thing.<BR/><BR/>She is not a great singer with a great vocal range. Make her sing accapella with no mic and see how well she can sing a song that is vocally demanding. I think you know what would happen. She would sound like a cat with a broken leg screeching.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2021263010707009752.post-29822706161439604242008-12-08T14:54:00.000-08:002008-12-08T14:54:00.000-08:00I respectfully disagree with you on this one Joyce...I respectfully disagree with you on this one Joyce. Idunno 'sis. I guess if you're consistent with your criticism, it works. What I find though is that we tend to be selectively judgmental. We'll be critical of Beyonce's ass shaking but we'll give a pass to the ass shaking we grew up on. And truthfully, how damaged are you from having seen Prince's performance of Darlin' Nikki in Purple Rain when you were in middle school? Black folks dancin' was sexual before we were ever brought here. It's part of who we are. I don't think protecting our children requires that we endorse an asexual existence.<BR/><BR/>I understand your concerns as a parent and realize that there's some ish you just can't endorse for your child. That's your job. I think we should also be protective of children that aren't our own and make reasonable efforts to shield them from the things that may harm their self image.<BR/><BR/>But I don't believe in getting in the way of artists. Beyonce and the song writers, choreographers and stylists that craft her image should have the space to do what they do. It's their canvass. Granted, there's is a huge industry around Beyonce, but at the core, it's performance art and sex is only part of her appeal.<BR/><BR/>To call out young artists and ignore Tina Turner places an unfair burden on younger artists. And in comparison to the male and female blues singers of years ago, Beyonce is bubblegum clean. She's also more than just a caricature -- her public persona is well rounded (fighting not make the obvious Beyonce booty comparison). Are you as critical of Jill Scott, for example, who makes ocassionally explicit music for adults?<BR/><BR/>If a black girl grows up and decides to be a recording artist, I don't see how Ms. Knowles (or is it Mrs. Carter) is a bad example.<BR/><BR/>Enough of this rant back. I gotta check for that video. Beyonce has a great ass.breeze29https://www.blogger.com/profile/14034525358216993099noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2021263010707009752.post-17925716689824225932008-12-03T16:50:00.000-08:002008-12-03T16:50:00.000-08:00As a woman and mom I get conflicted about these th...As a woman and mom I get conflicted about these things, too. I'd be lying if I said I don't dig Beyonce, BUT I don't want my daughter booty-shakin' like her. <BR/><BR/>It sounds like you're doing an excellent job. She'll be pissed, my daughter already is, but she'll love you for it.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01531001180084362992noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2021263010707009752.post-85695894901349681202008-12-03T08:14:00.000-08:002008-12-03T08:14:00.000-08:00hey joyce. karen and floyd's reggie here. it's gre...hey joyce. karen and floyd's reggie here. it's great that you are concerned and I would HOPE you are judgemntal about your daughter's behavior and actions. however, as a dancer, i have to be the lone dissenting voice up in here. i love B's dance moves. often in the west we tend to view african-american movement as being hypersexual and inappropriate when in fact it is incredibly indigenous and primitive. <BR/><BR/>i suggest both YOU and your baby girl take a couple of african dance classes. haven't you already? i think you'll find that, when placed in their proper prospective, those gyrations and thrusts are actually beautiful and empowering to the body human. my two cents. peace wit' two fingers...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2021263010707009752.post-6131932201550384542008-12-02T14:59:00.000-08:002008-12-02T14:59:00.000-08:00I completely agree with you. While I do not have c...I completely agree with you. While I do not have children, I was still disgusted by Beyonce's pelvic gestures and thought no child should be viewing that in the middle of the day. Beyonce, she who is soooo "religious" and a "lady of sophistication" needs to really think about her actions and what she is putting out there to younger women...especially little children.Moniquehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00916613783551290668noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2021263010707009752.post-59764930617745805452008-12-02T11:13:00.000-08:002008-12-02T11:13:00.000-08:00i refused to buy my teenage, hormones-raging broth...i refused to buy my teenage, hormones-raging brother beyonce's bday cd because she had no clothes on inside on the liner notes. i SO understand your feelings about20the physical exploitation these young women feel they are required to do to stay on top of their game.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2021263010707009752.post-6239052838057865132008-12-02T10:55:00.000-08:002008-12-02T10:55:00.000-08:00Joyce, first I am 'hating' on Beyonce because if ...Joyce, first I am 'hating' on Beyonce because if I booty shook like that I would probably throw my back or something esle out. All in all it would not be a pretty sight. LOL. But back to your blog, no I don't think it is wrong for you to think like you do about this, and wanting your daughter to aspire to dream. As a mentor to several young woman and men alike, I am saddened that so many of our young sistas think 'the means to the end' is lap dancing and booty shaking. I have heard young girls exclaim that they would kill in be a video as it could lead to a feature film career. And I want to ask them how many of those whom perform half naked on Nelly or other videos have ended up in mainstream movies. A couple have, Beyonce for one and a couple of others but there are so few who have done this. I would like these same young women to focus on learning, going to college and WANTING to be more than a video vixen. I realize my thinking may be old fashioned but my success as a long time college educator, lecturer and now writer bares this out. smile<BR/>Keep on keeping on.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2021263010707009752.post-60448327001489392992008-12-02T08:38:00.000-08:002008-12-02T08:38:00.000-08:00I think its a sign of us getting a little older (a...I think its a sign of us getting a little older (and perhaps wiser) that some of us (black women)see Beyonce' and other young songstresses shaking it and dropping it on stage and in videos. I think every young generation has had dances that made their parents blush or ashamed. I'm sure the Twist, Wahtoosee (sp?), and even the Jitterbug were dances that parents of young children and young adults wish were never created. I have mixed feelings about it. While I do think it's exploiting black women and categorizing us as objects, I wonder if (years ago) the same was thought of Tina Turner, Chaka Chan and some infamous black female performers even before Tina's era who performed half naked in very racy costumes thrusting their hips throughout the entire song. <BR/><BR/>Beyonce' is beautiful and talented and classy, in my opinion. She has been dancing this way since high school (I saw some old video of her and her friends practicing the similar moves in her backyard). <BR/><BR/>I don't like half the dance moves kids are doing today, but I'm getting a little older and I'm sure my parents weren't too thrilled of some of the moves I was doing in my 20's either.<BR/><BR/>I think sometimes we are more critical of young, black women, than we are of men. I hope that we can be encouraging and supportive of our daughters dreams and achievements and give them some latitude to make their own choices. <BR/><BR/>My hat is off to Beyonce' for her success and dance and acting talents. Would I tone down her gyrating dance moves?, sure. But, its her style. I often look at her and other young women who dress and dance in attention-getting ways and think..."You go girl. I had my turn, now it's yours." I think its more important how our daughters act after the dancing is over that I'm more concerned about; I hope they can turn it off and act like ladies and sons like gentlemen.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2021263010707009752.post-72958149433852829332008-12-02T08:23:00.000-08:002008-12-02T08:23:00.000-08:00Beyonce aside, booty shaking and overrated celebri...Beyonce aside, booty shaking and overrated celebrity showcasing in general plagues me as a parent. I thought I had more years before my children discovered that I "don't know anything". It is a daily struggle to elevate the importance of what's inside when all we see and hear about is what's on the outside and how much all of those accoutrements cost. <BR/><BR/>I am judgmental and I am okay with it. My sound judgment has made a remarkable difference in who I am considering where I come from. This is something that I also desire for my children. I'm sure the answers will come to you just when you need them most.T.Allenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07288157852760931385noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2021263010707009752.post-46065285908767629972008-12-02T07:46:00.000-08:002008-12-02T07:46:00.000-08:00I think this is an issue that plagues most parents...I think this is an issue that plagues most parents. Our initial reaction as parents is always to protect our child from the woes and perversions of the world. You are absolutely right to protect your child from what you deem as unfit for her. But we also have to remember that they will one day be adults and we have to give them every tool they need to excel through those perversions. In today’s society let’s face it we spend a lot of time letting the media raise our children. I have two sons and a daughter and when they ask me questions I answer them, when they see something that I think is wrong, I ask them what they think of it. We talk about it, we discuss what’s wrong and what’s right about it and we move forward from that together. It has helped to ground them and my two oldest are 6 and 4, you can’t wait till they are old. We can’t let our children just soak up life without being a driving force and sometimes we have to drive from the passenger side. <BR/><BR/>The biggest thing that helped me as a child was that my parents kept me well informed. Not to the point of knowing too much for my age but knowing what I needed to know and also knowing what was reflected in my environment. Yes I clubbed, opened it and closed it, and I had a good time but because they had managed to instill a sense of self in my subconscious I made sure I kept well within my range. Even as a married woman with children I still don’t stray far away from that upbringing. My parents weren’t strict, they didn’t lock me in my room or make all my decisions for me what they did was taught me how to know myself and to love myself no matter what, and that’s what helped me. So subconsciously I make all my decisions based on that. Kids are so much smarter than we give them credit for but we forget that sometimes all it takes is conversation. If we can just sneak a lesson into their subconscious, they’ll have it forever. We make it harder than it has to be.<BR/><BR/>Gyrating or not I don’t think anyone viewing her career can say that Beyonce is a trashy girl who is being defined by her gyrations. She’s intelligent, well spoken, and she keeps her nose clean. She’s beautiful, she’s eccentric, but she’s also grounded. Yes she’s young and shaking it but for anyone whose taking a African Dance class, it’s not much different. She can get off stage and just have had a shake fest but when she interviews or greets people you don’t see hoochie, you see well rounded, strong, independent woman. And ultimately that is what we want for our children. Let’s face it we are all going to do things that others are going to frown upon but it’s your definition of yourself that matters the most. <BR/><BR/>I received a email forward recently about 45 life lessons and the one that stood out the most to me was “What other people think of you is none of your business” If I love me, if I’m proud of me, if I can look myself in the face every day, if I can live my life with no regrets then who cares what everybody else thinks. If you can instill that in your daughter she’ll make the right choices. I did.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2021263010707009752.post-57141341693500792532008-12-02T02:29:00.000-08:002008-12-02T02:29:00.000-08:00Joycita, I see nothing wrong with Amber doing some...Joycita, I see nothing wrong with Amber doing some modeling and even some commercials. You know your limits, and I can't even imagine you allowing her to do anything that would make you even slightly uncomfortable. I worked with an attorney/professor who is quite beautiful. She did extensive modeling as a child and that money helped pay for her college education. This woman knows she is where she is today because of her smarts, but her looks helped pay the bills. Nothing wrong with that. Let's leave the gyrating to Beyonce, who continues to amaze me with her physiciality. And I have to say, though B gyrates a lot, she would just be another cute video girl if she wasn't so very smart and hardworking. She wants to be an icon and she is crafting a career that supports that vision. Sure she winds it up, but she is also very, very smart about her career.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2021263010707009752.post-76020344319217844932008-12-01T21:07:00.000-08:002008-12-01T21:07:00.000-08:00Well, I am not knocking B for working what she has...Well, I am not knocking B for working what she has. And let's be real, looks matter. If B was ugly (or didn't have the right makeup), then she wouldn't be anywhere close to where she is now. It's not wrong of you as a parent to hope your child doesn't go down that path but I think it's about what you put in her. As long as she knows that she is more than a pretty face, she'll be fine. Cultivate the awesome woman inside her and she'll be fine.She will go through the whole booty shaking, boy kissing at a party,early 20's clubhopper in little outfits that would make your eyes bug out. lol. B's got a gift and she's got a body. The two together make her one badass sistah.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2021263010707009752.post-75180376315178365292008-12-01T16:39:00.000-08:002008-12-01T16:39:00.000-08:00My approach to motherhood has always skewed more t...My approach to motherhood has always skewed more toward the liberal. I believe that my job as a parent is to provide my daughter with values and life coping skills so that she would be adequately prepared to be a contributing member of society. Experience is indeed the best teacher and children have to understand that both success and making mistakes are necessary life lessons. I never censored my daughter’s exposure to music/TV/books/movies/etc. but chose, instead to have constant open and honest communication with her about these things. I found than more often than not, she made the right choices. My daughter is now a 21-year old college student who is excelling. We have a wonderful relationship and I couldn’t be prouder of her. She plans to be a nurse but if she had chosen to go down the same path as Beyonce, My pride would be the same. It may not be the career that I would have chosen for her but I would still love & support her.<BR/><BR/>As a previous comment stated, ‘booty shaking will always be a part of black music.” I’ve seen traditional African dancing (and the dancers were naked except for a straw skirt covering the lover area) with more gyrating then any I’ve seen in Beyonce’s videos. I think Beyonce is a beautiful, multi-talented sister and I don’t think she is suffering from any self-esteem issue ore riding on the wings of fame by objectifying her body. I know that happens a lot in entertainment but I just don’t see it in the case of Beyonce.<BR/><BR/>Miss Joyce, you have more than a few years to work this through and I’m sure that what ever you little one grows up to be, she will be an asset to this world and always make you proudAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2021263010707009752.post-73808978233065794652008-12-01T13:17:00.000-08:002008-12-01T13:17:00.000-08:00As the father of a daughter, it troubles me when I...As the father of a daughter, it troubles me when I see young girls exploiting their bodies. I cannot believe that Beyonce's father was comfortable with selling his daughter as some type of writhing, gyrating sex-kitten. Keep your daughter as pure and innocent as long as you can. It is up to you to build up her self-esteem so she can love the person she is regardless of how she looks.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2021263010707009752.post-58247414406590238772008-12-01T12:49:00.000-08:002008-12-01T12:49:00.000-08:00Booty shaking will always be a part of black music...Booty shaking will always be a part of black music. From Tina Turner to Beyonce. Black Female sexuality is real and is nothing to be afraid of. As for judgement; everyone judges. It's all depends on how far you take it and how much of Beyonce's gyrating really affects you on a personal level. <BR/><BR/>Great Post.!<BR/><BR/>http://www.gettogethablog.comAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2021263010707009752.post-53164340803468937312008-12-01T11:48:00.000-08:002008-12-01T11:48:00.000-08:00Hello Joyce!Rarely do I reply to blogs. However, ...Hello Joyce!<BR/><BR/>Rarely do I reply to blogs. However, I just had to share this excerpt from my book with you. You'll understand why! <BR/><BR/>Joyce, guard your baby's eyes and ears! Please do! Thank you for having the courage to talk about it!<BR/><BR/>Pg. 65<BR/>BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU LET YOUR CHILDREN WATCH AND LISTEN TO<BR/>In studies of juvenile offenders, younger perpetrators tend to abuse younger victims, but are more likely to have intercourse with older victims. Sex acts by young children, between young children, are a learned behavior and are associated with sexual abuse or exposure to adult sex or pornography (Source: Childabuse.com).<BR/><BR/>I remember watching a popular movie back in the early ‘90s. I was around 17 years old. There was a scene in which two actors were engaged in sex. The man was so satisfied with how the woman performed in bed and how she made him feel, that he practically gave up his entire life as he knew it just to be with her. I remember thinking at that very moment: I want to make a man feel that way. I played that scene out in my head many times throughout the years. <BR/> <BR/>Sure, this may sound silly to some folks, but people, especially children, often try to imitate something or someone they see in the media or hear in a song. I witnessed this while visiting one of the local high schools. There’s a song that talks about tossing money up in the air on women in topless bars. The song is totally degrading to women, yet a young girl around 15 years old was singing and bouncing to the nasty lyrics. It was a disturbing scene. I also witnessed a sickening incident involving five little girls between the ages of 6 and 13. While visiting my mother, the little girls who live on her block were outside dancing to a song that was all about them “getting their freak on.” The young girls were dancing, popping, and grinding to the voice of a very popular female artist. The youngest girl laid down on the ground, opened her legs, and began rotating them in a butterfly motion. <BR/>We must be careful about what we let our children see and hear. If they become used to hearing and seeing these types of messages and images, their curiosity is piqued even more, and this makes it easier for someone to lure them into a relationship of sexual abuse.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2021263010707009752.post-88695846649928133392008-11-30T23:45:00.000-08:002008-11-30T23:45:00.000-08:00Thanks so much for your sharing and comments on my...Thanks so much for your sharing and comments on my MBB post. Now...about Beyonce...Honestly, I think the good thing is that since your daughter is a toddler, you don't have to sort it all out today. LOL. My guess is that you're already doing a great job of teaching her how to let her external beauty be a reflection of her gorgeous internal self. But, I get the conflict, and I feel it, too, as a grown-a woman. At 38, I don't think I've settled into that comfortable place where I am comfortable expressing my sensual feminine self *and* my brilliant intellectual self. I think some of that has to do with my parents completely neglecting the physical aspects of our beauty. Somewhere, though, there is balance. And, my guess is that it starts with the consciousness you're experiencing as a mother of a daughter. Hopefully, you'll figure it out...and then you can help me figure out how to get this little boy of mine to understand it, too.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com